Hey blog readers!
So, I come from the last era where the “old heads” before us passed on lessons bestowed upon them: the ways in how we’re expected to conduct ourselves in the presence of others… even if that means losing yourself..
I discovered that I’d entered a chasm of unconscious behavioral patterns that have warped my entire life… until Now. But in that place, I felt as if every move I made was watched & scrutinized. And no matter what I did, I felt incompetent. I felt in the wrong for not fitting into this premade, refurbished mold that no one else seemed to be having a problem with. For over a decade I’ve questioned myself as a woman, a person, & the security of my future business career. And I almost believed the lie, until the series of unfortunate events (*pun intended) that I’ve sunken into have helped me realize that I needed to relabel myself.
I was subconsciously masquerading as all of my former professors, family members, & those in the generations before who’ve encouraged me in this manner, just like how they were taught. So I don’t blame them. But I know better now.
The last few months I’ve delved deeper into a part of myself I’ve seen itty bitty glances of throughout my life, exploring what makes me tick (good & bad), accepting everything I experienced, & taking my own notes for a change on how I want to proceed into the future. My conclusion: In order for me to make it in this world- successful or not- I must be true to MYself. Not yourSELF. And the trick about that, is first you have to know yourself. I believe there’s a fine line between taking the advice of others & taking it on as a persona. We do it all the time. And the majority of us don’t know & some never will. Which is why people behave “out of character” outside of work or to different people.
The “old school” way of conducting business & handling people, as I see it, is soon to become extinct. We (my generation & the next) are making moves & I’m joining the movement! Granddad’s influence isn’t gone, but the cheap, loud cologne he sprayed to fake the funk is. If you want to make a change: Pay attention to conscious & unconscious habits. Observe them. And then challenge them & ask yourself why you do what you do & say what you say. Your answer or lack thereof will alert you of what to do next… if you’re willing to be honest with yourself.